Panic On

“Had a light one night in the dark.
It won’t show you too much of the future.
Let it go.
Let it fall behind.
I would never call on human nature.”

From “Panic On” by Madder Rose.


I love my iPod.  I love the way the shuffle function often catches me by surprise and transports me instantly back in time to a period when a particular song came to mean something.  Sign posts, stepping stones and mile stones.  Memories and emotions are re-awoken in seconds.

Sometimes my shuffle function seems to have a mind of its own as if willing me to rediscover an album that has been gathering dust on my shelf for far too long.  This week I listened to the wonderful “Panic On” album by Madder Rose in its entirety for the first time in several years.  I remember discovering it back in 1994 through airplay by John Peel and the odd track appearing on a steady stream of compilation tapes my friend Craig B would send me.  The album still sounds every bit as fantastic today.

Had the iPod existed back in ’94, I guess most played would have included:  Sugar; Pixies; Dinosaur Jr; Teenage Fanclub; Red House Painters; Smashing Pumpkins; The Breeders; The Tinglies; home recorded demos of Craig B’s; and Grant Lee Buffalo. 

I’ve attached a You Tube clip below of a song that still means a lot to me.  A monument or testament I can look back to and see I have happily journeyed with even if I couldn’t have seen much of the future back then.


3 Responses to “Panic On”

  1. 1 Craig April 7, 2009 at 4:02 pm

    Ok maybe you can help me with this, what if you felt that God was asking you to press delete on your i-pod and record collection, all those great songs & albums, all those memories, could you do it? would you do it? would you do it with a heart of worship? it’s something I’ve been struggling with for a long time.

  2. 2 thestatethatiamin April 7, 2009 at 4:27 pm

    Do you really think He is?

    There was a time in my younger years where we all seemed to be encouraged to get rid of records that weren’t Christian or could somehow pollute us. I don’t know that that was particularly helpful, but I wouldn’t just advocate that we ignore or dismiss those sort of actions either. Maybe we need to think for ourselves and to be posed that sort of question would be a biggie.

    At the end of the day I take the view that we ought to be careful what we listen to or watch as it can affect our thinking.

    Does music become an idol?

    Maybe I’ve just increasingly realised how gracious God has been even in the times I wasn’t walking that closely – how He used seemingly disposable songs to still shape my thinking and worldview.

    Maybe this blog is a bit like Paul looking at culture and turning it as a starting point to look to God. All those poets and sculpters who even made idols to an unknown god were trying to express something of the human condition. How many of the songs I love so much are trying to grapple with the same issues?

  3. 3 Craig April 9, 2009 at 4:09 pm

    Well probably 7 or 8 years ago I did just that. I felt that God was asking me to look at what I was listening to and what was influencing me so I took the majority of what had become a massive cd and record collection to a local charity shop, keeping things like U2 & Springsteen etc. At the time I didn’t feel like it was because the music was wrong but my attitude towards it and how I relied on it so much.

    So roll on a couple off years to the release of “No line on the Horizon” and as usual I didn’t just down load that on iTunes but bought Liam Finn’s “I’ll be lighting” album too. Slowly but surely I found I had bought back at least half of the collection I originally got rid off. This just made me think about my attitude to God with this and how reluctantly I had obeyed Him in the first place, it also made me think about where my heart really was.

    So last week after praying about it and feeling convicted I switched on the laptop, opened iTunes pressed select all and delete…. I think God wants to show me His heart in all this and after years of turmoil I just want to humbly obey with on if and buts this time.

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"The priest in the booth had a photographic memory for all he had heard. He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called "The State That I'm In"". From "The State I Am In" by Belle and Sebastian
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